Broken Threads in the Tapestry of Multiple Sclerosis
Multiple sclerosis is like a grumpy tenant; it doesn't pay the rent on time or intentionally damages the property. Sometimes I feel like I don't have control over my body, or at least it seems.
Some days MS rears its ugly head despite my best efforts to stay well.
The diagnosis of multiple sclerosis can shatter your world and change your life forever. I fully agree with this statement because that's what happened to me. How about you?
After I wrote my illness story, I discovered three emerging themes, and I heard these same themes when I listened to the narratives told by other women with MS. These themes are uncertainty, loss, and time.
Music is strong; multiple sclerosis is weak
In 2002, Matchbox 20 released a track titled Unwell. Every time I hear the song, I am transported back to 1990. That was the year I was diagnosed with MS.
For example, I should get some sleep because tomorrow might be good for something.
I felt like time had stopped when my doctor told me I had MS. Later that night, as I sat in my apartment in the dark, I struggled with thoughts of uncertainty and sadness. A slideshow of me sitting in a wheelchair played over and over and over.
I still feel the same way each time I hear this song today. The difference is that I now have a deeper understanding of my life with multiple sclerosis.
A conversation with my MS anthem
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